Let's take one step at a time

Official rule of thumb never be surprised when God shows up in ways you thought were too small. Today was a wonderful day to spend with friends and God. Although it didn't go the way I expected He came through.

Some may know that on February 19th, my mom and step dad will officially be divorced. When I found out a few months ago, my heart was a mess. I was angry. So very angry that my parents failed their marriage. I was bitter and hurtful towards them. I was the only one of the kids that knew and it hurt even more that I was holding a nasty secret and hiding emotions they didn't know they too were going to be feeling.

However, my heart has began to soften and I am understanding that it's not me that my mom and step dad look to, but God. Despite their feelings and decisions, the Lord loves them. This is humbling and also very comforting.

Today my sisters found out. Faith is well. She is strong and finds hope in God which I'm so thankful for. Lacie is about the same. Her heart is hurt, but because she is young she doesn't see the hardship that will come. I sometimes wonder if that is a blessing in disguise!?! Kirstin, however is hurt. She is 13 and at that age everything is painful. She is a very sensitive woman and she also holds a lot in. I'm praying that she continues her walk with God and express those frustrations with HIM. If you think of it, pray for my family's hearts especially Kirstin.

I have a good feeling that if this divorce does not miraculously disappear, which I have faith it still could, that our family will grow closer in love, at least us kids. My siblings and I have grown so much closer in the past year through this and I am encouraged by that.

The verses I shared with my sisters was James 1:2-4 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

and the Lords Prayer, Psalm 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

If anyone has any other verses that could comfort us all I will greatly accept them.

Blessing the Spaghetti

The last seven hours of tonight I have spent with all very special people. After the emotional day I experienced I wanted to go home and finish it alone locked in my room, but I had an event to attend with my fellow CRU behind the scenes people. I was bringing the salad to go along with our spaghetti dinner. My heart for the night was burdened with much thought about life and responsibility, I didn't want to spend my night discussing feelings.

So as I shopped for the ranch dressing and the perfect romaine lettuce I prayed for clarity and patience. Oh, how the Lord answers prayers!

After the delicious spaghetti that Troy and Adam made for us, we played a game. The game was serious, where we needed to share the heritage of our lives, the hand of God visible in our lives, the hardships we have experienced, and the happiest moments in our lives.


As we went around the room sharing in a group of twelve our hearts poured out. Never before have I felt so vulnerable with a group like this. I couldn't believe the amount of hurt we have all experienced and the amount of joy that has come from these struggles. God was so present in our sharing. He made sure that everyone of our stories affected all the others in someway.




I know that every story I heard, I felt so blessed to hear. I loved the trust that we shared and will continue to share in the future. As this group of leaders for CRU grows in number, our bond as the behind the scene members will become stronger. I'm so glad for this experience.

When our hearts were all laid out, we played some less serious games and stayed in a state of laughter for four hours. I'm so blessed to have a strong circle of friends.



Thank you Lord God, for the beautiful friendships that were established and made stronger tonight. You are so good to us when we do not deserve it. You give it to us anyway and that is an indescribable act of mercy. Thank you Lord Jesus!

Hearts shared...

I know that what is said in a group is what stays in the group, however I just want to share with you how impressed I am with the hearts that some of these girls in Impact have. Many times I found myself jaw dropping amazed by their thoughts and knowledge about who Christ is, what he has done for us, and what we need to be for Him. For any mothers who may read this, I want you to know that your girls have amazed me and touched my heart. I have learned so much about the way a teenage girl thinks again. It really has not been that long but I forgot so easily. I feel so blessed to be a leader and to have been able to share that moment with them. I'm not worried that they wouldn't seek deeper relationships with each other and God while they spend time with one another . I ask the Lord to bless them tonight as they sleep and to soften their heart further throughout this lifetime.

The beginning...

As of two weeks ago, I was excepted to the College of Education at Eastern. I'm ecstatic, but apprehensive about the work load. So far in school I have been doing well on keeping up. So lets hope I continue on that habit!

I'm still watching the little ones two days a week. Today my dear Luke told me the sweetest thing... "Seana, when I grow up you're going to marry me." So I responded with enthusiasm "I am? Luke, I would love to marry you." He was quick to tell me "You should ask your mom." Of course I wanted him to be the gentleman, so I said "I think because you're the boy you should ask her." So quickly he responded "Mmmm... I will when I am five!" No sooner. He made that clear. Who could resist such a proposal?

I'm so excited for everyone to know that I will be going to Budapest, Hungary very soon. Campus Crusade is taking us on its fourth and final trip to this location on February 26th. It will be the first time in four years since I have asked for support but I'm really excited to see how God works. Grace Church has already told me they will help support me, which relieves some from the cost.

To be completely honest I'm going to tell you... I'm terrified of what I will do there. Sharing my faith is never an issue, it's sharing to people I don't know. All I think is... Where are they coming from? Are they hurting? What do they want to hear? How can I reach them? I'm so relieved that the Lord knows the answers, I just wish I could too.

My prayer for tonight is that the Lord will lead at least one person in my path that will come to find Jesus. I hope that who ever this person is will be blessed tonight and will have an open heart to what we will bring to those in Budapest. I also will pray that I don't take control of who it is but let God work His wonders! Pray with me.